John 1: 6 There was a man sent from God whose name was John. 7 He came as a witness to testify concerning that light, so that through him all might believe. 8 He himself was not the light; he came only as a witness to the light…… 19 Now this was John’s testimony when the Jewish leaders in Jerusalem sent priests and Levites to ask him who he was. 20 He did not fail to confess, but confessed freely, “I am not the Messiah.”  21 They asked him, “Then who are you? Are you Elijah?”    He said, “I am not.”  “Are you the Prophet?”   He answered, “No.”  22 Finally they said, “Who are you? Give us an answer to take back to those who sent us. What do you say about yourself?” 23 John replied in the words of Isaiah the prophet, “I am the voice of one calling in the wilderness, ‘Make straight the way for the Lord.’” 24 Now the Pharisees who had been sent 25 questioned him, “Why then do you baptize if you are not the Messiah, nor Elijah, nor the Prophet?”  26 “I baptize with water,” John replied, “but among you stands one you do not know. 27 He is the one who comes after me, the straps of whose sandals I am not worthy to untie.”  28 This all happened at Bethany on the other side of the Jordan, where John was baptizing.

So, a man walks up to a vending machine, puts in 5 quarters, pushes the button for a Diet Coke, and a sign comes on that says, “Thank you for your selection. Your Diet Coke is now being ordered from a bottling plant in Brazil, and is about to be mixed, bottled and shipped; please come back to claim your selection in seven days.” Would you come back for it next week? I would probably push the coin return button and move on to the next vending machine.

If anyone ever had the patience for that kind of thing, it is quickly disappearing in the digital age, under the influence of computer technology. If it takes more than a nanosecond between when I press a key and something happens on the computer screen, I confess to getting rather huffy. We’re growing so accustomed to ever shorter times between our actions and their rewards and results that I’m glad I don’t own a real boomerang. Should I throw it, by the time it comes back, I’m afraid I’ll have lost patience for its return, have forgotten that I it was coming, and gone on to other things, like texting or going out for a latte. Ow!

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Mark 1: 1 The beginning of the good news about Jesus the Messiah, the Son of God, 2 as it is written in Isaiah the prophet:   “I will send my messenger ahead of you,  who will prepare your way”— 3 “a voice of one calling in the wilderness,‘Prepare the way for the Lord,  make straight paths for him.’” 4 And so John the Baptist appeared in the wilderness, preaching a baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sins. 5 The whole Judean countryside and all the people of Jerusalem went out to him. Confessing their sins, they were baptized by him in the Jordan River. 6 John wore clothing made of camel’s hair, with a leather belt around his waist, and he ate locusts and wild honey. 7 And this was his message: “After me comes the one more powerful than I, the straps of whose sandals I am not worthy to stoop down and untie. 8 I baptize you with water, but he will baptize you with the Holy Spirit.”

When we go home today, or to a restaurant, and chew on roast sermon, I hope that it will be clear to everyone what it was about: reviving the lost art of confession. People then may ask, “But what does confession have to do with Advent and Christmas? That sounds so gloomy and serious. I’m all ready for sheep and shepherds and wise men, Mary and a manger. So, why are we muddling about with the likes of cranky old John the Baptist and his ministry of baptism, and of hearing people’s confessions?

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Mark 13: 24 “But in those days, following that distress,  “‘the sun will be darkened,  and the moon will not give its light; 25 the stars will fall from the sky, and the heavenly bodies will be shaken.’  26 “At that time people will see the Son of Man coming in clouds with great power and glory. 27 And he will send his angels and gather his elect from the four winds, from the ends of the earth to the ends of the heavens.   28 “Now learn this lesson from the fig tree: As soon as its twigs get tender and its leaves come out, you know that summer is near. 29 Even so, when you see these things happening, you know that it is near, right at the door. 30 Truly I tell you, this generation will certainly not pass away until all these things have happened. 31 Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away. 32 “But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. 33 Be on guard! Be alert! You do not know when that time will come. 34 It’s like a man going away: He leaves his house and puts his servants in charge, each with their assigned task, and tells the one at the door to keep watch. “Therefore keep watch because you do not know when the owner of the house will come back—whether in the evening, or at midnight, or when the rooster crows, or at dawn. 36 If he comes suddenly, do not let him find you sleeping. 37 What I say to you, I say to everyone: ‘Watch!’”

And so it is the season of Advent, the First Sunday even. As we read this passage at the Sermon Roundtable Breakfast last Tuesday, someone asked, “So is Advent about celebrating that the Lord has come, or that the Lord shall come?” The answer?

Yes. The Lord has come; the Lord shall come. Happy Advent, past and future!

But you wouldn’t know that from all the department store Nativity scenes or the Christmas cards we get. We get and send beautiful Christmas cards with sweet, peaceful manger scenes by famous painters like Bruegels or Rembrandt, and I love them all. But never have I seen a Christmas card with Michelangelo’s painting of The Last Judgment. We’re all into the mangers and wise men, sheep and shepherds of Christ’s first Advent. But when it comes to separating the sheep from the goats at the his Second Advent, that one doesn’t get its own holiday shopping sprees. Read more …

Matthew 16:  13 When Jesus came to the region of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, “Who do people say the Son of Man is?”  14 They replied, “Some say John the Baptist; others say Elijah; and still others, Jeremiah or one of the prophets.”    15 “But what about you?” he asked. “Who do you say I am?”  16 Simon Peter answered, “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.”  17 Jesus replied, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah, for this was not revealed to you by flesh and blood, but by my Father in heaven. 18 And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not overcome it. 19 I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven; whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.” 20 Then he ordered his disciples not to tell anyone that he was the Messiah.

I hope its okay to tell jokes about pastors, because I shall. And I’m taking my permission from Jesus, who told in today’s Gospel passage, a joke about a soon-to-be pastor, Simon Peter.

So, a man dies and appears before St. Peter, who’s staffing his booth in front of the Pearly Gates. Peter says, “Welcome to heaven. Here’s the keys to your shiny new Lincoln Town Car car. Its parked right over there, waiting for you. Or didn’t you know that everyone here gets a car that reflects their state of grace and godliness before they died?”

“Wow,” said the new entrant to heaven. “Mother Teresa must be riding around in a stretch limo.”

“She gets a shiny spankin’ new one every day,” said Peter.

“And what about our pastor, who died a few years back?

“You’ll see him in a stretch limo, too,” Peter replied.

“He always struck me as a very godly man,” the new arrival observed.

“Actually,” St. Peter said, “the church janitor lets him chauffeur him around, whenever he gets tired of pedaling his tricycle.”

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Mark 7:31 Then Jesus left the vicinity of Tyre and went through Sidon, down to the Sea of Galilee and into the region of the Decapolis. 32 There some people brought to him a man who was deaf and could hardly talk, and they begged Jesus to place his hand on him.  33 After he took him aside, away from the crowd, Jesus put his fingers into the man’s ears. Then he spit and touched the man’s tongue. 34 He looked up to heaven and with a deep sigh said to him, “Ephphatha!” (which means “Be opened!”). 35 At this, the man’s ears were opened, his tongue was loosened and he began to speak plainly. 36 Jesus commanded them not to tell anyone. But the more he did so, the more they kept talking about it. 37 People were overwhelmed with amazement. “He has done everything well,” they said. “He even makes the deaf hear and the mute speak.”

I have a word I wish to give to Mark-Peter as a gift on this day of his licensing. Actually, two words. You all can listen too and do with those words what you like, because they’re really for all Christians, not just pastors. These are not words that Mark-Peter and the rest of us don’t know already. We have seen Mark-Peter put them into practice, regularly. So, I’m effectively preaching to the converted.

I simply offer these two words by way of reminder, because I need that same reminder over and over again. And if anyone here ever gets the impression that I have forgotten these two words, then I urge you to remind me of them, too.

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